On achievement...

The last post was definitely a bit of a downer, so before people start telling me that I'm being too harsh on myself, I should also add that just because I failed doesn't mean that I haven't had a sense of achievement. In the past eight months, I have:

- Learnt to read and hold basic conversations in Vietnamese.
- Confidently navigated the Hanoi traffic by pushbike on a daily basis.
- Learnt heaps about ethnic minorities in Vietnam and the many challenges that they face.
- Edited a whole bunch of English language documents.
- Designed and organised content for a newsletter and brochures, along with templates.
- Delivered a bunch of training and wrote accompanying notes and manuals.
- Improved the way that my organisation manages its knowledge and information, and facilitated public access to its data repository via the website.
- Travelled quite a bit.
- Made a lot of new friends.

Most importantly, I've managed to line up a new role which is a step up from where I am now, which is something. I'll be starting in about four weeks, but more about that later. Onward and upward...

On failure.

Well, you know what they say about the best laid plans...

Next week, I will be finishing up in my role here in Hanoi. It will have been over eight months since I commenced what should have been an eighteen-month role - with scope to extend, if possible.

I knew within three months of starting that I wouldn't be staying for my full term. This was for a number of reasons, but it became quite clear to me that there was a distinct gap between what my organisation wanted to achieve through my position, and my professional experience, knowledge and abilities. And then there are all the other challenges that come with working in international development, such as language and cultural barriers, and the availability of counterpart staff.

Of course, the reality of development work is that one should leave one's expectations at the door, and for the better part, I have done this. It didn't take long to realise that my supervisor didn't really understand the duties and outcomes that were listed in the role descriptions, and nor did I. So, it was clear to me that failure was already inevitable - at least in terms of achieving the prescribed outcomes.

However, this also prompted the opportunity to take a few months to monitor staff activities, and constantly ask questions, in order to understand exactly what it was that my organisation did, who their stakeholders and clients were, what their information and knowledge needs were, and the kinds of services and products we could deliver in order to meet those needs. As fundamental information and knowledge management practice, this was an excellent opportunity to scope the landscape and document my findings, with a comprehensive powerpoint presentation and list of proposed projects to develop over the following fifteen months.

But the other important thing about development work is that it's not about me. It's about the organisation, and whilst my role is to advise, they are the ones who ultimately make the decisions. As as important as my proposals were to me, there are people suffering from extreme poverty, poor sanitation and farming techniques, deforestation, and the social impact of being a disempowered ethnic minority. That's at the heart of the organisation's work, and being as under-resourced as they are, the focus of most of their energy is in the field at the grass-roots level.The fact is that whilst the activities that I propose would definitely add value to the organisation, they are not as important as the ever-arising immediate issues that the organisation faces.

This is something I must always remind myself - it's not about me, or my work. I am not necessary in the same way that other staff are. If anything, I'm often a burden, requiring a counterpart to act as translator and facilitator for my work. That's not to say that what I have to offer isn't appreciated - it absolutely is, and every contribution I give is warmly received. However, as a change agent, I feel like a failure. Even though I understand that change is a slow process, I need to first be able to see the scope for change - a commitment to achieve common outcomes as a team.

The problem is that, as much as I intended to suspend any expectations of the role, I still had the expectation of myself that I would have some quantifiable achievements to show for my time here. I can confidently say that I've done a lot of good work here, and helped where I can. To use that cliche, I've made a difference. But the reality is also that I am simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. I am taking the place of somebody else who, with the right skills and knowledge, can be the change agent that I have failed to be.

So, I've already persisted longer than numerous friends and peers have advised me, but I'm stubborn like that - unwilling to accept failure. Perhaps the best lesson learnt here has been to know when it's time to accept it and move on. That time is now.

2014: the Year of Making Life Difficult for Myself.

For me, 2014 has been a challenging year - no doubt about it. It's been a year of taking risks, pushing boundaries, and taking myself far beyond my comfort zone, both personally and professionally. It's been a year of achievements, but also about discovering limitations, and coming to terms with them. They've been valuable learning experiences, if frustrating and discouraging, but I have no regrets.

And so, next year, things are going to be a bit different. It's going to be a year of refocusing on my personal strengths. Return to my comfort zone, and concentrate on being awesome at the things that I am experienced and passionate about.

So, here's a list of my personal goals, as one does on New Year's Eve:

1. Reconnect with the literary world. Don't just read books - share my experiences with other readers, attend literary festivals, get back in touch with those who I've lost contact with in the past couple of years.

2. Reconnect with the library and information industry. Put aside some time every week to read blogs and articles and reflect on what the real issues of the moment are.

3. Write. Write, write, write. Stop thinking and planning, and just write. Especially performance material. I only wrote one thing this year, and it was awesome. Next year, I will write a whole new show (which I have already started planning). There, I said it. Now you have to hold me to it.

4. Perform more. Whether it's karaoke, or finding an open mic night, get back out there.

5. Dance more. I've got YouTube and floor space at home, so use it. Go to exchanges and workshops and keep learning.

6. Travel more. Because I can. Because I should. Because the whole world is out there.

7. Make real plans for the future. Yes, serendipity is all well and good, and it's given me some wonderful opportunities to experience new things, but now it's time to get back down to earth.

8. Be kind to myself. I am often my own worst critic, but rarely my best advocate. I need to be both.

2015 will be the Year of Being Awesome.

Slight Return

So, last week saw me making a brief return to Melbourne - a total of four days, which was originally three, but my return flight was cancelled!

Being back in my home turf was strange - like sleepwalking through a dream. It was all very familiar, but never felt real. I did a lot of the random things that I missed when I was away, like seeing films at the Nova and the Kino, or eating a souvlaki from Jimmy Grant's, or drinking from the tap, or just wandering through the leafy suburbs and taking in the fresh air. And it was cold - gloriously so! I've always been a cold weather person, which is partially why I wanted to go to Hanoi, being one of the least tropical of development work destinations (my other preferred choices being Ulaanbatar or Kathmandu). I look forward to the winter here.

It was also a brief return to libraryland, and I presented at the ALIA National Conference, looking at the various adventures that one could have with a librarianship qualification, including moving interstate, travelling overseas, and exploring related fields. Being at the conference was a bit of a blast from the past - the who's who of my professional past were there, and there was a bit of an ongoing game of "Where are they now?" It's also interesting chatting to other professionals who are at a similar stage in their profession, and I often wonder where I might be now if certain deciding factors along my career had been different. It's certainly a diverse field, and five years now I could be working anywhere, be it a research library, NGO, arts festival or with Indigenous communities.

But almost as quickly as I arrived, I was gone. This moment has already become a fleeting (albeit expensive) memory in my career, and I don't have plans to return until I've finished my assignment here. Upon my return to work yesterday, I was struck by how difficult I found getting back into the mindset of working here. It was like my trip to Melbourne had hit a reset button in my brain, and now I needed to go through the whole cultural adjustment process again.

It wasn't the best of days, but I know they'll get better again.

Post Scriptum

It's the first day of the month, which means that new assignments are now posted for international development roles - some of which are suited to professionals in library and information management. For your convenience, I have listed them below (link to full details in the position title):

Librarian Management Trainer - 6 months
Sekolah Menengah Kejuruan Negeri 3 Kendari (SMKN 3 Kendari) / State Vocational High School 3 Kendari
Kendari, Indonesia (Remote location - Sulawesi)

The Librarian Management Trainer will work within SMKN 3 Kendari to create an international standard Electronic Library System (ELS) and build staff capacity in library and electronic management. 

Essential Qualifications / Experience:

• Tertiary qualifications in Librarianship, Information and Media Management or a related field 
• Two years of experience as a librarian

Knowledge Management Officer - 12 months
Ministry of Industry (MoI) - Micro-Enterprise Development Program (MEDP UN)
Kathmandu, Nepal

The Knowledge Management Officer will work within the Ministry of Industry (MoI) on the Micro-Enterprise Development for Poverty Alleviation (MEDPA) Program, providing technical support and building staff capacity to improve, manage and promote the Micro-Enterprise Knowledge Management Centre. 

Essential Qualifications / Experience:

• Bachelor Degree in Business Administration, Business Information Systems, Information Management, Library and Information Science or a relevant field
• Two years of experience developing or implementing knowledge management systems including analysing information needs and implementing strategies, policies and processes
• Experience in promoting knowledge sharing practices within an organisation

Early Childhood Development Adviser - 18 months
Buk bilong Pikinini (BbP)
Port Moresby, PNG

The Early Childhood Development Advisor will work within Buk bilong Pikinini (BbP) to build staff capacity to utilise and monitor Early Childhood Education (ECE) practices, as well as strengthen program management. 

Essential Qualifications / Experience:

• Bachelor Degree in Early Childhood Care and Education, Education, Library Studies or a realted discipline 
• Three years of expereince in an education setting, particularly early childhood

All assignments are fully-funded through the Australian Government, including flights, preparation, visas, accommodation, insurance, and a generous living allowance. Plus a unique experience that will certainly put your career into perspective.

So, what are you waiting for?

Librarian no more?

So, it's the final day of BlogJune, and it seems like a fitting time for me to announce a change in my career. Four weeks from today, I will be departing overseas, and embarking on a new role, working with a human rights NGO for eighteen months. It's a very exciting opportunity, one that's well-suited to my skills and knowledge, which requires my qualification, and one that I wouldn't have been successful in attaining, were I without my current range of experience.

However, it's not a librarian role, nor are there any libraries involved. My position title will be "Organisational Development Advisor" - which could be used to describe pretty much anybody who works in international development. It could best be described as a knowledge management and communications consultant position, based on the job description, but until I'm actually performing the role, it's hard to say, really.

So, whilst I am thrilled to accept this amazing opportunity, there is a part of me that feels that this might be the end of my career of "being a librarian" (as opposed to "doing things that librarians do"). My work here will certainly open doors in terms of getting experience with NGOs and working in International Development, but if my experience of the library industry is anything to go by, it will be difficult to get a look-in for a librarian position, after eighteen months of not-being-a-librarian.

And that's okay. Because it's about what I'm doing with my time. I know myself well enough to know that I'm happiest when I'm engaged in special projects, and performing roles that have a start and a finish. I love that sense of accomplishment. Having been a librarian has afforded me with the skills to do some really interesting work, and now with this next chapter in my life, who knows where it will lead me.

But for now, that's me,signing off - no longer bibliotheque bound!

Librarianship as a means or an end?

Well, this is my second-last BlogJune post for the month, so if you'll indulge me, I'm going to revert to one more exercise in navel-gazing.

Why did we become librarians? Did we see it as a means, or as an end? Allow me to elaborate:

Librarianship as an end.

As a child, we're always faced with the question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" And throughout our lives, we're confronted with this status anxiety of who we are, and how we fit into the society in which we live. I managed to avoid this question for a number of years by being an Arts student, and studying various humanities for their own sake - which, whilst being very noble and academic, and provided me with a strong knowledge of the world's cultural diversity, paired with strong critical thinking skills, did not afford me with any improved social standing. I found myself, in my early 20s, still faced with that question, "What do I want to be." I eventually made a list, and librarianship was in my top three choice professions, along with Teaching and Arts Administration. Yes, I was clearly destined for a career in one of the world's most undervalued professions, whatever my choice was.

Furthermore, whilst I pursued my graduate studies in information management, I found myself working in libraries, and it was at this point that I started to notice the status that having a librarianship qualification afforded - obviously, because they were the ones with all the authority.

And that's what's at the heart of the question, "What do you want to be?" It's about having a field in which you are an authority. Being a professional.

Which is why, when we see organisations making librarians redundant, or we see librarian roles replaced by generalist non-librarianship-qualified positions, or librarian roles are bogged down by menial duties that pretty much anybody could do, then this feels like an attack on our status as librarians. It takes away our ability to exist as a professional in our field. At this point, you start to hear librarians grumbling sentences starting with, "I didn't get a Masters in Information Science just so that..."

And even within the industry, there is such a focus on what kind of librarian you are - whether it's a school, public, TAFE, university, law, parliamentary, court, medical, or special librarian - and one's social standing within the industry is, to an extent, prescribed by the kind of librarian you are. There is certainly a pecking order, even if nobody wants to admit it!

Librarianship as a means.

Some might say that, instead of asking "What do you want to be when you grow up?", we should be asking, "What do you want to do?" Make a list, and then find you a job that allows you to do those things.

It might be something like:
- I want to assist academics with their research
- I want to fill a room with books that I think people will like, and then I get to share those books with those people.
- I want to help parents teach their pre-school children how to read.
- I want to help the disadvantaged and underprivileged people in the community have access to information and knowledge.
- I want to facilitate interesting public discussions on topics of literature, culture or social issues.
- I want to support professionals in a field that I find meaningful by being an information broker that serves their needs.
- I want to teach students the skills that they need in order to succeed with their academic pursuits.
- I want to develop innovative communication systems for the collection, curation and dissemination of knowledge.
- I want to review books and then ask other people what they thought of them.

And so on. Whenever I hear sentences starting with, "I didn't become a librarian just so that..." I wonder, "Well, what are you doing here, then? Why aren't you doing the things that you became a librarian for?"

So often, as New Graduates, we have it in our head that we need to get any librarian job - just to get the experience of being a librarian - when maybe what we need to be doing is focusing on getting a job where we get to do the things that we want to do with our lives. And maybe that means volunteering at a primary school library, rather than going for that entry level assistant law courts library job.

Librarianship as an end... to a means!

I remember when I was back at first year of uni, and there was this comedian who told a joke along the lines of, "Hey guys, welcome to university. Here's some advice that will save you three years of your life and tens of thousands of dollars. Find the thing you want to do most in your life... and just go and do it!" It's a philosophy that seems to have worked for some of the world's most successful entrepreneurs.

However, for the rest of us, we need a Bachelor degree and, let's be honest, probably a Masters degree or two, in order for certain doors to open. A qualification in librarianship does open these doors - and is generally a requirement for most job applications to avoid being thrown straight onto the slush pile.

But the thing is that it opens other doors as well. It gives you that status to be a professional, but what you choose to do with it is up to you. So, when you're looking at applying for that next librarian position, ask the question, "What would I be doing in this role? Is that why I became a librarian?"

And if not, then which job is?