Wednesday, 15 June 2022

Blogjune Day 15 - Another day, another night, has taken you again

Today's question: Do I procrastinate?

I don't procrastinate - I prioritise. I don't leave things to the last minute - I work to deadlines. I often feel like I'm too busy to be able to procrastinate, and if I'm not working on something, it's not because I'm avoiding work - it's because I've decided to stop working for now.

This may all seem like a case of semantics, but the very concept of procrastination has a lot to answer for. It's indicative of a society that values productivity over mental health - and when we don't heed the call, we get guilt tripped for it.

Well, no, I will avoid doing today what I can put off until tomorrow if my brain tells me that's what I need to do... but I will first check that I don't have too many other things scheduled to do tomorrow. And if I decide to spend an hour having a nap, or watching tv, or doing random chores around the house, then I'm not going to feel guilty for it.

That said - and this goes back to my earlier post about wanting more time - there are things that I wished that I did, if I had more time and energy. I'd like to write and perform more. I'd like to exercise more. I'd like to socialise and get out into the world more... but I don't. And I feel bad for that - even guilty. Sometimes I can snap myself into action by telling myself, 'Just fucking do it,' and then I do. I feel like the last couple of years have taken its toll on my energy, though, and the urge just to take another night off, and watch tv and sleep, has taken precedence over Doing Stuff with my Free Time. Okay, so it's not procrastination, but it's also not a sustainable lifestyle choice.

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